I would tell you that most (key word there) of the guys I have dated were great people and I really wish them the best, they just weren’t the person for me. But, if you know anything about my story, you know that one person I dated is not my favorite. I told myself – stop talking about it. It’s not that I haven’t moved on or am still living in that chapter because trust me, if you’ve been around me at all in the past six months you would know I’m not the same person.
Someone told me recently that when you go through something painful, your mind brings it up and wants you to talk about it so you can compartmentalize what happened and try to make sense of it all. Sadly, some peoples actions just don’t make sense.
I heard a song yesterday that really struck me. It didn’t hit home because it still hurts, but because I feel bad for the girl that I used to be and I wish I could go back and tell myself I deserved better and that it would all be okay. I wish I had listened to all my friends and family, or even one of the red flags staring me down.
Here are part of the lyrics to the song:
You're blurring the lines, you're playing two sides Just make up your mind You can tell me to stay, you can push me away Have space or get close, but you can’t do both You can kiss me goodnight or kiss me goodbye Baby, love me or don't But you can't do, you can't do both
If you’ve ever drug someone along – you need to take a step back and realize how you could be hurting someone. If you’ve been the one hurt in this situation, I hope you know there is someone better out there who will not make you feel like an option, or a backup plan, but instead I hope you feel like the only choice.
At the end of the day, I am grateful for what I went through because I know everything happens for a reason and my past made me the person that I am today. Nonetheless, it doesn’t make what happened okay. Hurting people is never justifiable. You are stronger than how others make you feel and more valuable than how some people decide to treat you.
Know your value.
Know your worth.
Know how you should be treated.
Know what isn’t okay.
Don’t let anyone treat you any different - ever.
If you ever question whether or not you want to be part of someone’s life, just make a choice. Don’t keep them in limbo while you’re being indecisive. Be part of it or decide to walk away, love them or don’t, but you can’t do both.